Album Bracketology, Part Two: A Lazy Use of Letters
In the midst of a pandemic, one man is writing an “album tournament.”
BY MATTHEW KAUFFMAN SMITH
[Note: Propeller’s editorial staff is working remotely and has ignored all messages attempting to assign an editor to Album Bracketology. As is traditional, the site will nevertheless allow Matthew Kauffman Smith to publish his double-elimination “music tournament.” His system is confusing and his taste is mediocre at best. We have asked our editorial intern to post the installments. Anyone reading beyond this point does so at their own risk.]
Part 1: Early Eliminations
Part 2: Lazy Use of Letters
Part 3: Canadians
Part 4: The Hot Dog Cart
Dear Bracket Buttcheese:
Why do you often start your articles with a letter? It seems lazy.
Sincerely,
Rex from Parts Unknown
Hi, Rexy! Thanks for the fax! This tournament to crown the album of the year—months after the year ends—has always been a community. It’s not my bracket, it’s not your bracket. It’s our bracket. We here at Propeller like to give the fans a voice since they have absolutely no say in the results. Plus, the editors prefer other people’s writing in these installments. This year, our readers are even more important because they have more time on their hands.
Dear Bracket Rodent:
I’m stuck at home with time to kill, and I still have no interest in you and your little “tournament.”
Bruno
Oslo, Norway
Thanks, Bruno! The faxes are rolling in! Judging by the high number of hits on this site—like a dozen or so—Bruno seems to be in the minority. After all, it could be said that Album Bracketology is the biggest sporting-ish event happening right now. Your choices are pro wrestling, HORSE on ESPN, and this. You’re welcome.
So, let’s get back to the action. Today, we’ll get down to the final 64. We go down to sideline reporter Alvin Bracketology for the top match-ups of winners bracket round 3.
3. Brittany Howard vs. The National: Howard won this competition as part of the Alabama Shakes in 2015 and faces The National, who has never finished outside of the top 5, placing No. 3 in 2010, No. 3 in 2014, No. 4 in 2017. Winner? The National.
2. Julia Jacklin vs. MUNA: MUNA finished 36th in 2017 but followed up their great debut with an even better album in 2019. Julia Jacklin was the preseason No. 1 in Propeller’s 2019-So-Far Tournament back in May. Winner? Julia Jacklin, who is racking up wins against formidable opponents after beating Weyes Blood in Round 2.
1. Tacocat vs. The Regrettes.Two young bands with a similar pop punk sound, and fronted by charismatic, honest female lead singers. This one took two listen-offs in the Propeller offices. All of the debating was conducted via fax. Winner? Tacocat—and not just because the band’s name is a palindrome. But it doesn’t hurt.
Alvin is not done! Thanks to his fine reporting, he can also start to reveal numbers 96-65.
96. The Beaches: The Professnal EP
95. Soweto Kinch: The Black Peril
94. Guster: Look Alive
93. Black midi: Schlagenheim
92. The Get Up Kids: Problems
91. Griz: Ride Waves
90. Bob Mould: Sunshine Rock
89. Billy Woods & Kenny Segal: Hiding Places
88. Control Top: Covert Contracts
87. Kap Bambino: Dust, Fierce, Forever
86. Diane Coffee: Internet Arms
85. Kate Tempest: The Book of Traps and Lessons
84. Lucy Dacus: 2019
83. The Osyx: The OSYX
82. Summer Cannibals: Can’t Tell Me No
81. Psapp: Tourists
80. Kaina: Next to the Sun
While we really wanted to stop and honor Psapp, who, for better or worse, helped to bring the “toytronica” genre to the music industry, we instead honor Kaina, partly because she’s deserving, and partly because Psapp doesn’t have a lot of recent videos.
Propeller would also like to acknowledge Guster, Bob Mould, Kate Tempest (twice before), Lucy Dacus (twice before) and Summer Cannibals for their repeat performances in the top 105.
79. American Football: LP3
78. Yanissa: 15.19
77. The Ocean Blue: Kings and Queens / Knaves and Thieves
76. Anna Meredith: FIBS
75. Ladytron: Ladytron
74. Lee Fields & the Expressions: It Rains Love
73. Helado Negro: This is How You Smile
72. BBES: At the Party With My Brown Friends/Fruit Bats: Gold Past Life
71. Ariana Grande: thank u, next
70. Y La Bamba: Mujeres
The Propeller Bracketology Committee would like to commend all of the participants, including the Ocean Blue, who would have been in the countdown if it had existed in the early ’90s, and Ariana Grande, who, despite writing mediocre hits in the past, impressed the committee this year. However, we’re awarding the video to local, Portland stalwart Y la Bamba:
Dear Easy listening $^*$(^$^*%$($,
When will you, T*^$&^$(, get your head out of your f%^(#(% a$$ and honor some heavy metal already.
Shane
Headbanger, OK
Shane, thanks for reading! We here at Propeller tolerate metal. Sometimes we even love it. Like this year. Wait for it…
69. Angel Olsen: All Mirrors
68. Gallant: Sweet Insomia
67. Bedouine: Birds Songs of a Killjoy
66. Denzel Curry: ZUU
65. Baroness: Gold & Grey
We honor Baroness, Propeller’s favorite metal band. And we love 69-66 as well, but the best Losers Bracket round 4 loser was, by far, Baroness.
In the next installment, we’ll talk about the album of the decade tournament, and we’ll whittle down to the top 32. Stay safe and keep on rockin’.
Xoxo,
The Propeller staff
Matthew Kauffman Smith continues to do this.
